A Year of Bad Movies # 27 — “Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker”
Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker! (2002)
IMDB Score: 2.5 out of 10
Wow. Just wow.
Chris Seaver writes, directs and co-stars (in blackface, no less) in the undeniably bad film, “Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker!”
The best (and worst) movie I've seen that involves a teenage dorkess, a minstrel show reject and a disco monkey.
Unlike some of the other writer/director/actors’ films I’ve seen lately who’ve tried to make something of substance and have failed miserably, Seaver seemingly sought to make an hour-long farce of a film filled to the brim with ill-conceived ideas, shoddy production work and over-the-top acting. In those regards, he succeeded wildly.
“Mulva” makes no bones about being a low-budget bad movie. It looks like it was shot on a home video camera from the 1980s and has that unbridled sense of joy that can only come when making a movie with and for your friends.
In fact, “Mulva” is exactly the type of film I would have made in high school with my pals if I had the resources (and heck, I’ll admit it, the unrepressed imagination) that Seaver has. How it wound up on Netflix, though, remains a mystery.
Seriously, the movie looks like something you find stuck to the bottom of a bus station bench.
“Mulva” stars Missy Donatuti as a chocolate syrup-addicted candy-cretin riding an unending sugar high because of the fact that she is about to experience her first Halloween as a trick-or-treater.
Unfortunately, a zombie outbreak has erupted in her small town of Tromaville (yes, the same hometown of the Toxic Avenger) and it’s up to Mulva and her trusty blackface sporting, Bill Cosby quoting neighbor Mr. Bonejack (Seaver) to save the day.
This movie has almost everything you could ask for in a bad zombie movie: tap-dancing and pop-locking ghouls, a scene where zombies chase humans set to “Yakety Sax,” appearances by Lloyd Kaufman and the rest of the Tromafilm staple (including the Toxic Avenger, Sgt. Kabukiman N.Y.P.D. and a Killer Condom), a zombie punching a hole in a teenager’s face, a musical interlude by New York City’s Naked Cowboy, a hot dog raping a doughnut and a deux ex machina courtesy of a disco monkey.
This is a messed up movie. Just check out this clip:
Seriously, I had a lot of fun watching this movie and, perhaps in a first for my Year of Bad Movies, would gladly watch it again someday.
This brings us to our first real discussion of what makes a bad movie enjoyable.
“Mulva” is without a doubt a bad movie. At the same time, though, I had more fun watching it then I had watching any of last year’s Academy Award Best Picture nominations. Each and every one of those award-nominated films were, unquestionably, good movies — but “Mulva” was just more of a joy to watch.
Why is that though? Maybe I enjoyed the film the same way I kind of have a need to rubberneck at car accidents? There’s no denying that catching a glimpse at a catastrophic failure can be good for a few laughs but “Mulva” really didn’t fail because it never really tried to succeed.
Maybe I just enjoyed “Mulva” because of its total lack of aspirations. It didn’t try to be anything more then a crappy home-movie shot for a few bucks.
It was filmmaking for filmmaking sense.
Plus I got to see a disco monkey fight zombies — which in the end, is always a good thing.
