Rotten Tomatoes score: 0 out of 100

IMDB score: 2 out of 10

Earlier this year I had the chance to see the film “Best Worst Movie.”

A documentary about the legacy of “Troll 2,” “Best Worst Movie was made by Michael Stephenson, the now-adult actor who played young Joshua in the 1990 horror film.

This awesome poster is available from Mondo Tees and the Alamo Drafthouse.

Although Stephenson’s film was an amazing story that was entertaining from start to finish, I walked out of his movie a little conflicted.

Sure my sides hurt from laughing so hard at the documentary’s loving ribbing of “Troll 2,” but I remembered really digging the horror movie when I saw it as a kid.

Could I possibly have liked a movie that bad? Or was a generation’s love for irony and cynicism responsible for taking a decent horror movie and transforming it into something epic in its awfulness.

Well, after watching “Troll 2” for the first time in almost 20 years, I have to say that yes, the movie is that bad.

It turns out I had a terrible taste in films as a kid (some would say, I still do).

“Troll 2” is the sequel only in name to the Sonny Bono fantasy film I talked about a few days ago. In fact, the movie doesn’t even feature any trolls. The potato-sack wearing, paper-mache mask donning monsters of the movie are actually goblins. And in case you forget that fact, they actually live in a town named Nilbog, “goblin” spelled backwards naturally.

The non-troll goblin stars of "Troll 2."

When Joshua and his family decide to vacation in the small town of Nilbog, they unintentionally wind up on the menu for a town full of shape-changing goblins. From there, things get a little weird.

It seems that goblins can’t stand the taste of meat — which puts a bit of a dampener on their love for eating humans. Not one to let a little thing like biology get in the way of their desire to chow down on people, the goblins concoct an elaborate scheme that involves feeding people nasty green Gak-looking slime.

Once a person chows down on this junk, they are turned into human/plant hybrids — the perfect late-night snack for a hungry goblin.

Thankfully, Joshua has a little help in saving his family from becoming goblin chow: his dead grandfather who may or may not be in hell.

With his grandfather coaching him, Joshua will stop at nothing when it comes to saving his parents from being turned into plant-people including pulling down his pants and peeing on dinner, playing with fire and crashing goblin church services.

Want some Joshua?

The movie has become known in recent years for its highly quotable bad dialogue that is delivered in truly bizarre ways from a cast of mostly amateur actors.

Watching the film for the first time since seeing “Best Worst Movie,” I noticed that Stephenson’s documentary had a definite effect on my enjoyment of the film.

Now having known a little more about the actors and crew who made the movie, I spent more time wondering what was going through the cast and crew’s heads while they made the movie then actually paying attention to the plot and story.

“Troll 2” may not be the film I remembered it being as a kid, but it is still enjoyable to watch — if only because it truly is the best worst movie.

Rotten Tomatoes score: 33 out of 100

IMDB score: 3.5 out of 10

Maybe it’s because I’ve seen “Troll 2,” a film that defines bad moviemaking, but I just didn’t think the original “Troll” was that bad. If anything, I thought the film was a clever, if cheesy, fantasy film that’s perfect for children.

This is the troll, not Sonny Bono.

With an all-star cast of b-movie proportions that includes Sonny Bono, Anne Lockhart, Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Michael Moriarty, “Troll” is a fantasy/comedy/horror about a troll attempting to turn an apartment complex into a renascence fair nut’s wet dream.

Oh, and another thing: “Troll” features the original Harry Potter.

Yes, that’s right. Years before J.K. Rowling dreamt up her four-eyed boy wizard cash cow, Harry Potter, Jr. was saving his little sister from the evil machinations of an evil troll that had the power to turn Sonny Bono into a giant hairy pickle.

The Potter family made a poor choice when choosing what day to move into their new apartment. Before they could unpack all of their boxes, the littlest Potter, Wendy, stumbled upon the movie’s namesake.

After kidnapping Wendy and stealing her identity, the troll ninjas his way into the Potter family. When he isn’t going nuts over hamburgers and putting the smack down on his new big brother, Harry Potter, the Troll takes the time to visit all of his new neighbors and transform them into giant pulsating pickles that, when they pop, unleash a mess of foliage and fairies upon the apartment.

Soon enough, the apartment building is full of dancing, singing Muppets.

A singing, chirping mushroom is just one of many terrifying creatures that inhabit the world of "Troll."

Luckily, Harry Potter discovers an ally in his battle to rescue his sister, Eunice St. Clair, a former princess/current witch whose duty it is to put a stop to her former boyfriend, the troll.

Yes, the movie is silly and yes there is no shortage of corny, awkward laugh-inducing scenes but there is still something charming about the film. When compared to most of the live-action family movies that get released every year, “Troll” has a surplus of heart and imagination. There are some pretty decent special effects and, for small children, some real good scares.

While it may not be the “Labyrinth,” it’s also no “Troll 2.”

Plus, children of all ages can find something to learn from “Troll.”

For example, I discovered that it’s perfectly acceptable for little people to befriend small children because of their height similarity. While you may think it’s creepy that a middle-aged man would become friends with a small girl and invite her into his apartment unaccompanied, everything’s A-OK as long as they are both shorter then four feet.

Plus, apparently all little people harbor a secret dream to become elves and if they are lucky enough to befriend a small girl who is really a troll in disguise, they will have their dreams come true and be transformed into Gelfling-looking Muppets that vaguely resemble an elf version of themselves.

I also learned that Sonny Bono as a swinging bachelor is a lot more frightening to me then any number of trolls, goblins, giant bat-monsters or talking tree stumps. Julia Louis-Dreyfus makes a hot wood nymph though.

From the ever-present city bus to cell phone-wielding car drivers to even out of control bicyclists, potential vehicular manslaughter is around every corner.

But what happens after that fateful encounter with everybody’s friendly neighborhood scythe-wielding robe wearer? Quite a few filmmakers have attempted to answer the mysteries of the afterlife.

Here are a few potential glimpses into what life has in store for you after you get splattered by that car because you were to busy texting your friend.

Defending Your Life (1991)

Who bites the dust?: Albert Brooks via bus accident

Defending Your Life (1991)

Where does he go?: Judgment City is a processing center for all recently deceased. During your stay in Judgment City, your life will be examined and your worthiness judged. Where on earth, many men suffered from penis envy, Brooks’ character, Daniel, finds himself experiencing brain envy in a system where the smarter you are the more chance you have to become a full-fledged member of the universe instead of being sent back to Earth to try again.

Is it pleasant?: If you like white middle-class suburbia. Brook’s vision of the afterlife is a biting satire of, amongst other things, America’s increasing proclivity towards standardization and groupthink. The recently deceased wear matching tunics and stay in relatively identical rooms while they await judgment. To pass the time you can visit mini-malls, comedy clubs and any number of ethnic restaurants. The opening credits are a beautifully shot collection of scenes featuring Daniel’s initiation into the bureaucracy that is Judgment City.

What Dreams May Come (1998)

Who bites the dust?: Robin Williams via car accident

What Dreams May Come (1998)

Where does he go?: After dying, Chris (Williams) awakens in his own personal heaven, a kaleidoscope of oil-based painting inspired landscapes and colors. Connected with his wife’s own paintings, Chris’ afterlife is a continuously changing thing of beauty where heaven can be anything or anyone you want it to be.

Is it pleasant?: “What Dreams May Come” gets the award for coolest idea for what heaven is like. The notion of a personal heaven where anyone can build what ever tickles their fancy will appeal to the auteur in us all. But for every cloud’s silver lining, there’s a bucket full of rain waiting to pour down on you. Director Vincent Ward also receives the award for most nightmare-inducing hell. His vision of a sea of faces made up of suicides crying out in pain and frustration will stick with audiences long after the movie has ended.

Fluke (1995)

Who bites the dust?: Matthew Modine via car accident

Fluke (1995)

Where does he go?: To the dog house. After dying in a violent accident, Modine’s character, Thomas, is reincarnated into the body of a newborn puppy, Fluke. Thomas begins to relearn all of life’s basic lessons, but this time through the eyes of a dog. But soon Fluke begins to have dreams of another life with a wife and children. Under the watchful eye of Rumbo (voiced by Samuel “Snakes on a Plane” Jackson), Fluke begins a quest to reclaim some aspect of his former life.

Is it pleasant?: While it may seem neat to be reincarnated into someone new and still retain all prior life knowledge and use your last life’s lessons to make a better future for yourself, “Fluke” proves that sometimes remembering isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. After living a full and somewhat rewarding life as a man, Thomas finds he can’t settle for his new life as Fluke. After finding his old family, he begins to insert himself into his old life in anyway he can – to disastrous results. There’s a reason ignorance is bliss.